Who Ate All The Pies

Obscene season ticket prices to be slashed?

News reaches us that Premiership chairmen are going to be forced into cutting 'obscene' ticket prices because fans have just about had enough of being the victims of daylight robbery every weekend, and as a result, football has reached a tipping point.

Two top-flight chairmen have expressed the same view, both of whom predict price cuts all round next season. 'It is a serious issue that has reached saturation point across the country,' said Phil Gartside, chairman of Bolton. 'We feel duty bound to make a stance by reducing the cost for our season ticket holders, and I'm sure other clubs will follow suit next season and listen to public opinion.' But surely the tickets are inflated at the chairs' behest?

This weekend saw ManYoo fans protesting about the amount being charged to let their fans watch their side at Fulham. They were asked for a whopping £45 to watch their team, and that doesn't include travel and grub... although they hadn't got far to travel from Essex eh? Ho Ho Ho... I'll get me coat. A senior executive from another of the Premiership's 'big four' clubs told Observer Sport that prices could not go any higher. 'Officially we are monitoring the situation,' he said. 'But privately we have realised that ticket prices have reached their maximum, at least in the immediate future.'

These warnings come slap bang in the middle of an attendance slump. Despite an increased capacity at Arsenal and Manchester United, the average attendance is down from last year, and whilst the big four continue to sell out their games, the overall Premiership average is down by more than 1,000 year on year and now stands at 32,775, not including this weekend. What is causing fans to stay away? Well, once, you could watch the footy and not dent the wallet too much, and know exactly when you'd be going out. Basically, high prices and amended kick-off times to enable saturated TV coverage aren't encouraging fans to get down the ground. 

Of course, a lot of money is generated by the TV rights, which obviously help clubs to bring in new players and the like. That said, the Premier League negotiated a new £600million, three-year deal for overseas TV rights to the Premiership. Add the £1.7 billion Sky and Setanta will pay to screen matches in Britain, and the £400m for internet and mobile phone rights, and it seems scandalous that ticket prices continually increase. Each club will be getting around £900m per season (starting in August).

Apart from drops in season ticket prices, a group are also want away matches addressed. The Football Supporters' Federation want a fixed price for all travelling supporters. 'Away fans in England are unique. You would not get 5,000 Milan supporters travelling to Juventus. If prices were to stay in line with the Taylor Report's recommendation, then £15 would be a fair price for those who travel to watch their team.' The report, published in January 1990 in the aftermath of the Hillsborough disaster, stated that 'it should be possible for seating to be £6'. With inflation, that would mean fans paying just £9.60 now, rather than the average of about £30.

So what's the answer? Well, looking at Germany's Bundesliga, the average attendance was approximately 40,000, which is superior to our league matches. In fact, it's about a quarter more fans in through the turnstiles, shouting for their team. German fans can buy tickets for as little as £10 or £15 for all games, and in some cases, terracing is being used, which gives a fan a feeling of real unity, as opposed to the sterile stadia over here. What is interesting is that the Bundesliga is renowned for its competitiveness, with many teams standing a chance of winning it. Should we look at the German model to fix our game? [Mof Gimmers]

Was Barton's 'stamp' intentional?

What does everyone make of the latest incident dogging Joey Barton? Man City gaffer Stuart Pearce reckons that the situation is becoming a "witch-hunt", with allegations and finger wagging come from all at Pompey.

Twitcher Redknapp claimed that Barton had set out to injure Pedro Mendes in the game at Fratton Park and that anyone who thought otherwise needed "their heads looking at". City's response to Twitchers comments were terse and to the point. "Mr Redknapp is entitled to his view," a spokesman said. "But we don't agree with a single thing he has said."

What do you reckon? Personally, I don't think Barton did anything wrong and Mendes was incredibly unlucky to come away crocked from an accidental clash like that... however, you may think differently... so tell us! [Mof Gimmers]

Free travel to football matches

Fans who have experienced the thrill of an away match will know how addictive it is. The trip down, the pre-match pints in a strange pub, being in a strange ground. It's like a holiday with a football match stuck in the middle of it! However, loads give it a wide berth because they can't get a lift down to the games. Well, you needn't fear that any more.

A website called WeWillfollow aims to stop all that worry and hassle by allowing you to offer and request lifts to games home and away, and it’s completely free. Added to that, the site also has a ticket exchange for fans with a spare. It's all rather nice isn't it? To add to the community feeling, WeWillFollow also have a unique 'Exile List' for each club, so if you've drifted away from your club (geographically speaking) you can register as a member on the site and talk to other exiled supporters of your club. With a list of 1000+ supporters clubs too, you need never feel lonely and exiled again! Have a look and sign up with the site now!

Hossam Ghaly gets his teeth kicked out

Poor old Hossam Ghaly. You play well against Portsmouth, only to be rewarded with having three of your teeth booted out. Ouch.

More Spurs news this way

Glen Johnson nicked for stealing a toilet from B&Q

This has to be the oddest football story I've heard in ages, but England defender Glen Johnson, who plays for Portsmouth on loan from Chelsea, and Millwall striker Ben May were caught at a B&Q in Kent on Wednesday after the pair were spotted by a security guard putting a toilet seat into a box with a cheaper price tag before they reached the checkout. Does this mean he's a toilet trader? (note to lawyers, I'm joking)

According to The Sun, the pair also avoided paying for a set of taps by concealing them underneath a sink at the checkout. Apparently, they thought it was all quite funny... until the police got involved.

A worker at the store told The Sun: "We all recognised Johnson. No one could quite believe a bloke like him, with all that money, would be moronic enough to nick a toilet seat. But that's what him and May were doing. They were spotted by one of our security guards, a chap of 74, and cops arrived as they were trying to leave. They seemed to find the whole thing funny and couldn't stop smirking even after they had been arrested." A Kent Police spokesman said that they'd "arrested two 22-year-old men on Wednesday on suspicion of theft in Dartford. Both men have been issued with £80 fixed penalty notices." Gary Double, Portsmouth FC's director of communications, said: "We won't be making a statement." A Millwall spokeswoman also refused to comment. We'll leave it for you to comment instead. [Mof Gimmers]

THE VOTE Worst January transfer so far?

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you:

a) Ben Thatcher, Alan Pardew's first signing as Charlton boss. Fee: £500,000. Bargain.
b) Djimi Traore, arguably the worst ever player to win a Champions League title, moves from Charlton to Portsmouth, for £1m. A steal!
c) West Ham bag journeyman Nigel Quashie from West Brom, for £1.5m.
d) Sheffield Utd sign 'striker' (I use the term very loosely) Jon Stead from Sunderland, for £750,000.

What an uninspiring quartet of transfers they make. Vote for your worst…

Pompey sign Traore (who is better than Zidane)

With the news that Djimi Traore has joined Portsmouth from Charlton for £1m, let's look at the great man in action. Slightly unfair to compare him to Zizou... but funny all the same.

[Mof Gimmers]

Sean Davis gives Lee Young-Pyo some diving pointers

This funny incident from New Year's Day suggests Portsmouth's Sean Davis isn't convinced the contact he made with Tottenham's Lee Young-Pyo was forceful enough to require a swallow dive. Davis gives the South Korean a taste of his own medicine, much to the approval of the onlooking Pompey fans!

[Rob Parker]

Horror Tackle: Noe Pamarot on Hossam Ghaly

A kindly YouTuber has eventually got round to uploading Portsmouth defender Noe Pamarot's foot-first assault on Spurs' Hossam Ghaly. The sickening crunch on impact indicates it is worthy of Horror Tackle status even if it wasn't worth a yellow card. Keep your eyes peeled for one of the four teeth Ghaly lost, which can be seen flying from his mouth. Nasty!

Click here to watch the video or get more Horror Tackle action by clicking here or here.

[Rob Parker]

Laurent Robert squealing when he gets tackled

Does exactly what it says on the tin! Believe it or not, the noise made by Laurent Robert is caused by Chris Perry's tackle and he is not simultaneously shot by a sniper!

[Rob Parker]